Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
