Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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