I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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