with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
MIDGETS
????
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
