so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
