i just google imaged poop.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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