Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
where does the pee come out of this thing
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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