Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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