Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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