Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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