well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
