Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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