either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
