God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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