Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
