dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
