Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
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