Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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