I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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