And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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