she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
