It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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