He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
