so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
