they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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