Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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