My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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