oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Randomize
