is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
