are you still at the devil's house?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
