where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
