i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
So vagazzling was a success
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
