What did we do last night that was yellow?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
