but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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