I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
