Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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