Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Found your dick twin last night
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize
