doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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