wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
