that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
