she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I need water and some morals
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
