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I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
