It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
