Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
