Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
