I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
this will be a night to untag.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
