I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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