yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
they need to just BURY HIM!
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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