she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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