So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
